i finally feel like i can write now.
right now.
the past few months have been a damn doozy, to say the freaking least (lol). i haven't posted anything since january 13. i guess i could blame a lot of things for that, but instead, blanketed, i was just tired. i wasn't resting well, my knee felt like it wasn't improving, and things were just not right.
jesse and i celebrated 2 years on february 7. we broke up on march 16. the weeks leading up to the breakup weren't the best. our communication was suffering, we were both on different pages, it was best for us to stop. i didn't want us to end up hating each other, altogether, so we agreed on a break.
surprisingly, i'm feeling pretty awesome since then. i'm doing a lot more things just for me, as the mood strikes--whether it's taking a different route home, walking until my knee feels like it's going to fall off or taking a shot on my lunch break, lol. i have been enjoying my life and the freedom i have doing whatever i want, when the mood hits me. i just focus on me and making myself a better person. i don't have to worry about anyone else or focus on what they're doing/not doing. it's been pretty cool so far.
work has been...a mess. my managers really make me wonder if they're aliens or demon-possessed. just very...off...a lot. i should work for myself, permanently.
i've been doing some reflecting, more working out, more meditating, etc...and it's been great. i want to be a much better person, just for me. and that's where i start--finding things i want to change about myself, and actually working towards changing them.
it's been pretty good.
